I was sitting at home yesterday morning deeply contemplating and journaling about a very difficult conversation I needed to have with someone close to me. The kind of conversation that you know you need to confront to keep a relationship thriving in a space of love.
I was crippled thinking about it. It made me physically nauseous and I started feeling so many physical symptoms just from the emotional stress that came from the mere idea of confronting this fear. I was afraid of being open and honest about how I felt. I was afraid of the outcome maybe not being in my favour. I was afraid of having others think of me in a way that didn’t reflect who I truly was. These and a few other fears prevented me from facilitating a conversation that could bring me closer to someone I loved. Fear was standing in my way. I felt it in my body, in my heart and I couldn’t shake it.
Until something hit me…I’m totally scared of having this conversation and making matters worse. BUT, what would happen if I wasn’t scared? What would happen if fear didn’t consume all of me?
Well, simply, I’d have the opportunity to shift my experience. I would have new possibilities. I could be the honest person who speaks their truth instead of someone who hides behind the guise of fear. Without the fear I might actually be excited about getting to know someone a little more deeply and starting that process by letting them get to know me a little more deeply. I might be so overjoyed at the possibility of being closer with someone I feel separate from. Those are just a few possibilities of what might take place if fear hadn’t caught and trapped me.
There’s one thing I know about fear for sure. I see it in myself and in talking to all my clients every single day. When fear comes we try to push it away. We try to find a solution to overcome it or ignore it or replace it with other things that feel good. We RESIST fear. In our resistance our fear not only persists, but it literally gets in the way of possibility, freedom and being our most empowered selves. I preach empowerment a lot on this platform and the most important thing to remember about living an empowered life is not the absence of fear, or getting OVER our fears. Living an empowered life means befriending our fears. Taking them along on the ride. Honouring their rightful place within us. Fear is so natural for us to feel but we don’t need to let it run our lives. Our goal is not to get over our fears, our goal is to get GOOD at our fears. When fear greets us, we can use it as a tool to get to know ourselves better and to be the best versions of ourselves.
Here’s a quick and simple exercise to help you feel good about your fears. Next time anxiety, overwhelm or fear strikes, ask yourself these questions and jot what comes in your journal:
1. Who would I be without this fear?
2. What is this fear revealing to me about me?
3. Is my comfort zone of hiding behind/moving away from this fear, greater than my calling to confront it?
4. What are some positive possibilities that I can create when I act bravely with fear present?
May you always remember that bravery and courage cannot exist without a presence of fear. We need it to be the strongest versions of ourselves, so bow to it! It’s giving you an opportunity to be brave.
If these journal prompts served you and you’re craving more tools just like this in addition to video workshops, EFT sequences, audio meditations, breath work practices, downloadable journal prompt PDF’s, and live monthly coaching sessions with me, I welcome you to try out Club Bliss. Club Bliss is a membership based platform with all of the listed tools and services above, and if you’re a first timer you get the first two weeks free to explore and dive deep into all the available resources designed to have you feeling peace and empowerment! https://parisaliving.com/pages/club-bliss